NEWS ALERT ! The Toilet Paper Shortage. Buy Charmin Stock !
67Who would not miss this guy ?
A Scary Proposition Indeed !
Good day to you good folk here at HP. As most of you are well aware I have always considered it my civic duty to keep you good folk current on the latest hard hitting news articles . I have always made an effort to keep you current on the news that most media outlets are simply Ignoring or are just underreporting and today is no different. Because I happened upon a news story so scary , so earthshaking that it chilled me to the bone ! And I would be less than responsible if I did not share this Information with you. So before I share this with you , I need you to know something I am not one of these the sky is falling types. I don't think 9-11 was an Inside job and I don't think Michael Jackson is actually on a mothership up above planet Earth. I consider myself to be a guy with his feet firmly planted on the terra firma.
Now we have no shortage of news that is enough to make us just want to throw our hands up in the air and tap out like they do in MMA fighting. We have volcanoes, earthquakes , Goldman Sachs , Tiger Woods and those ever pesky real housewives on those TV Shows. And to boot 24 has been cancelled ! It Is enough for one to want to create a bunker in their living room. ( So I can watch the NBA playoffs of course ! ) But now its getting scary ! Now when you think of some of the essentials of life you of course think about air , clean water , and food. But there is another commodity most of us don't even think about that we probably consider a staple of our existence and I am talking about toilet paper ! And the reason I mention this is because there is an Impending shortage of toilet paper looming in our future ! And remember where you heard it first !
I was perusing all of the usual Internet websites and was looking at the FOX NEWS website when I saw the article. My jaw dropped ! It seems that from the source LiveScience.com there is a shortage of good raw materials in which to manufacture good toilet paper. Most of the toilet paper has come from recycled materials like advertisements , magazines , and newspapers and other available print media.
But with the advent of the Internet most of us these days get our news and print our coupons from sources other then print media and our recycling bins are getting a thinner supply of raw material upon which to recycle and make toilet paper. Now in the case of the New York and Los Angeles Times as well as Time magazine I can understand how this shortage might have been created as no one wants to read the tripe these guys want to pass off as journalism. I do not call the New York Times all the news fit to put in the kitty box for nothing !
But I digress. Anyway it seems that sources for good toilet paper are dwindling pretty thin . And that the TP In our future might be let's say a little rougher ! No I am not talking about like grades of sandpaper rough just a tad more errrr uncomftorable ! Translation : Keep the baby powder handy !
Now what the far reaching Implications of this Impending calamity might be I am not sure. Maybe it's time to stockpile ! Maybe sell some on EBAY . I don't know. Now it would be really easy for me to get into some of the cruder aspects and more ribald humor that come with a situation like this. However I choose to take the high road and not get into the toilet humor and bodily function comments that usually follow . ( Tempting as it is ! ) But I just felt that you good folk need to know about this so that you can make the necessary preperations for what may transpire. So keep throwing the NY and LA Times into the recycling bin so that we can make proper use of their product and maybe its time to buy some stock in Charmin !
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msorensson Happy Sunday to you and I am glad that you got a chuckle out of my little report here. I hope your vacation to Europe was comftorable regardless of that Inconvenience
Great article Tony. I got political aspect of it but I rather be silent.
Well socialism brings all kind of shortages. They call themselves progressives.
Good day to you Vladmir. Sometimes being silent is the best policy. I wish I was better at that ! Thanks for dropping by my friend.
Tony,
Sorry but I don't have your restraint this is a crappy situation!!!!!!!!!!!
Tom somebody had to break out the metaphors LOL ! Thank you for the valuble Input and Happy Sunday to you !
You are too funny. Thanks for helping me find a new Ebay niche.
suziecat as a member of our hub community I feel a personal responsibility to help out where I can. So I am glad that I could be of service to you ! Happy Sunday
Tony - The stock play is buy Weyerhauser (WY)!!
Hmrjmr thanks for the tip ! And I wish you a Happy and Peaceful Sunday. Always nice to have you drop by
Who would have thought?? Grim news indeed!
What?!? No more squeezing??? What's this world coming to?? Ha ha Tony, I wonder what will be coming down the pipe for the future? XD
Paula this is a pretty serious situation no doubt. Man whats next no cable modem ?
Hi Ya Beth ! Squeezing takes on a whole different meaning now does it not ? Beth I promise to keep you informed of any more serious developments ! Nice to have you drop by !
Tony, you do find the hottest (craziest?) news around! I am looking forward to your next find!
No toilet paper? We Filipinos have a joke about this. The joke is - what will you do if you are in the little room and there is no paper around except for the bus ticket in your pocket? I will not tell you what the answer is but you can go figure. Or if you have a Filipino friend there with you, ask him/her. Hahaha!
By the way, the bus ticket we are talking about here is the size of a credit card! Hahaha!
Hi Jill my dear friend. As always I am happy to have you drop by. And yes you are right I do seem to have a knack for finding some of the strangest new , most of the time by accident. I just wonder if the Bus pass has sharp edges and if they are washable. Jill always happy to see you around. By the way the hub on the river in the cave was awesome !
Hi Tony, Great idea for Hubbing! Thank you so much for writing this Hub. I think this would be like loosing an American Icon.
Ron
As Always also a2z50
All I can say is that if we emulate Europe...OUCH!
Is this a tissue of lies!
Tony, Where do you find all these tidbits of bad news? You really have a knack for the unusual. This is very bad news. I never run out of toilet paper or coffee. I consider those 2 items most important.
I'd like to be ROFL but this is no laughing matter, especially since we no longer have that huge Sears catalog for backup. I think I will stock up and then, just in case, I'll start gleaning corn cobs as soon as the combines are done. Then I guess I'll have to build an outhouse 'cause I don't think the plumbing at our house will tolerate corn cobs. Thanks for the heads up. ;P
amazing terrific work off the chart thanks
Ron always great to have you drop by. It Is not so much we will be losing toilet paper. Its just gonna be a little rougher on our backsides. :)
BPop I thought we were already on our way to duplicating Europe.
iatkins I wish I were not kidding but here ya go !
Pamela coffee is one of my four food groups , I would get withdrawals ! I just seem to find the strange stuff. What can I say ?
U Neek you got trees in your yard right ? LOL.And I am happy to be of service to you ! Corncobs sound mighty painful !
To thevoice thank you kindly and I wish you a good week !
OMG, well I guess its time to break out the leaves! Or maybe we should do it Roman style and get sponges! (YUCK I AM JOKING!) but seriously that is disturbing....well our money is certainly becoming more and more worthless everyday...we might end up literally wiping our asses with "twenties" pretty soon! ha ha ha (LOVED YOUR HUB BUD!)- JJ
Hi JJ ! So good to see you around here. I was wonderin . Did the Romans have reuseable sponges. Kinda scary isn't that ? Glad you got a good chuckle out of the hub.
My friend, if you were reading Fox News, you better check a secondary source. It may be an early campaign to push for the elimination of trees all together which would make someone rich.
LOL here come the conspiracy theories. I guess FOX has a vendetta against trees ! Nonetheless I also heard a report from the Wall Street Journal Monday morning about the same thing. So I feel it could be legit !
great content thanks
hmm, I may be making a career change, TP Broker has a nice ring to it don't you think?
pond supples glad you enjoyed the hub.
sunflowerbucky this is why I like you. You can turn lemons into lemonade. A profitable career change. Nice call !
Your charming Charmin hub brought out the poet in me, so here is my poetic advice.
Here is the issue about toilet tissue.
It is currently in short supply.
So when you use it, please don't lose it,
You may need it to re-apply.
drbj thank you for your contribution. I enjoy it immensely ! :)
Nice work Tony, I hope the supply lasts a while longer. Maybe the current administration in Washington will create a new tax that will limit usage I hope not but It would not surprise me. I see your Lakers looked liked themselves again in the last game. Have a good day.
Good evening to you Truth from Truth. Please don't inspire our elected officials to try to create a new tax. Wea all know that is their favorite pastime ! And it seems like the Lakers got their legs back under them last night. I look forward to the Boston/Cleveland series. I have a feeling its gonna be epic !
Well I am an Charmin ultra girl, even have it in my save money hub, I never give more than 25 cents a roll-50 cents double,hard to find singles but when I do that really is the best deal and I will be sure I have a lifetime supply, by having so much I can easily wait for a great sale and needless to say I have top of closets full, under beds, bathroom shelves and large closet there loaded. I have never seen yet a pk of TP I would be 7/8 dollars for,please.I buy northern sometimes but Charmin is just the best. Oh, yes you have some good music too.
Pollyannalana good evening to you and may I see you have very good foresight.I can naver pass up a good sale either. And thank you for the kind words about my music hubs. Yours have been quite outstanding as well !
tony, I just read your comment in the forum for the first time today and it made me laugh. I had to look at your writings, needless to say I am still laughing. I am now one of your fans. Thanks for the pick me up.
archdaw thank you for dropping by. And I am glad that you are getting a chuckle. In a ever more serious world we all need to laugh a little more. And thanks for being a fan
tony, I'm so happy you've put this report to the people. I thought I done gone daft when I buy toilet paper I noticed the rolls were shrinking...more narrow and thought jeeezes I know the economies in the tank but to cut the quantity of TP just nuts, thanks for the rest of the story! Peace :)
katie it is my mission here at HP to watch out for all my fellow hubbers. And I know all of us are paying more and getting less ! Glad you enjoyed my little blurb here. Peace to you my friend.
Oh, no!! It'll be that John Wayne toilet paper - rough, tough, and won't take no $%^& off anybody!!
Habee that might be to disturbing to think about ! Thanks for dropping in.
sounds stinkin hehehehe, Charmin, save it for the next day, hehe, Tony, you take care, Maita
OMG recycled toilet paper ? HOLY COW the thought is just to disturbing ! Maita you can be funny ! Take care my lovely friend !
Buy stock in cotton! I imagine the kleenx industry will be in trouble too - new ebay name "Puffs".
Jane my friend I believe that you are onto something here. You are brilliant ! Thanks for dropping by.
your writing is good
Why thank you funky.
msorensson Level 3 Commenter 2 years ago
When we went to Europe a long time ago, I was shocked to find their toilet papers. I do not know that it is the same now..but needless to say, I missed Charmin, lol.
Thank you, I enjoyed it.